#14: Field Notes
On the monastic impulse
-Dennis Miller Bunker, Wild Asters, 1889
must i explain where i’ve been? 🪑
I started writing my substack two years ago this October. you wouldn’t know this, i only sent it to about three people and have since archived those posts, but i remember feeling so very inspired by fall.
To fill you in, my summer can only be described as monastic. i love a disappearing act.
I lived in malibu among two dogs and one dog-like cat. I met incredibly kind people. I walked the same beaches and frequented the same coffee shops. From July through September, I probably saw four friends total, only once or twice each. (i’m sorry :,) )
oh and i got a new yob!
i didn’t write. i didn’t think. i only read fantasy. i barely surfed (burnout courtesy of the Mentawais). i meditated a ton (and by meditated i mean mostly thinking about how i probably should be meditating, but first i reallyyy need to see what was on facebook marketplace, like immediately).
I accidentally joined the order of quiet people who stare at the ocean. more on that soon...
Soooo, all that said, i cannot contain my excitement that it’s fall again. !! Another summer survived (by the grace of God). I used to love summer as a kid, but somewhere along the way it became the enemy of my personal mythos. My reasons would be too long to list here but for now we can just say it’s the thing that stands between me and my favorite time of year. Summers are challenging for me. Next time, check in on me around June?
Fall always feels like a return to form: the light softens, the air crisps, and the collective unconscious exhales. Time to reap, mellow out, nest, write again.
It feels good to be writing a field note here once more. My intention in this offering feels equal parts selfish and pure...
self-servingly: Field Notes keeps me engaged with the material I love. it’s quite a lovely practice to see to.
open-handedly: sending three little/big things that might create connection, curiosity, resonance, or deliver a pretty art piece to your inbox feels like a worthy endeavor.
The following notes all shared with me by people dear to me. i feel really grateful to have people share these things with me, it feels only fair to share these with you!
¡Ándale!!!
I. Pema Chödrön: Train Like a Jedi
A girl can only hope to channel yoda like this one day. 🍵
Pema’s getting older and it’s making me sad (selfishly), but her vitality, wisdom, and humor are stronger than ever. My dad shared this one with me, which meant the world. If you know me, sharing anything Pema is my love language.
she’s so happy. she’s so wise. she’s my obi wan kenobi.
train like a jedi little ones, may the force be with you.
II. a quote:
“A river can’t flow without banks.”
A best friend shared this one with me, and it became my motto all summer. Giving myself a routine, time-blocked structure (locking tf in), was the kindest way I could support myself.
without the container of a pool, all that water just spills flat across the concrete.
The banks are what let what’s vital flow.
There’s freedom in discipline.
Form follows intention.
Intention defines structure.
Structure serves flow.
III. A snippet of a much deeper truth
“You know wrestling’s fake, but there’s something legitimate about it. More legitimate than anything else. Because it’s the closest to what the world’s actually like.”
Shared with me over dinner recently by an old friend who encouraged me to turn field notes back on. thanks friend <3
Essentially, Rick says professional wrestling is the most honest art form because it admits it’s fake. Everyone’s in on the illusion.
this is much like life no? it’s all made up and the realest thing we can do is admitting it so. sure, this may be a bit deductive but if we all are aware of the game we can play more honestly.
have more fun, be more free.
skip a level.
defuse from the storyline.
sit back and smile.
thanks for being here too!
🎐 Lida 🎐
Missed you love you love Field Notes
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